Some Most Embarrassing Things That Happen With Pelvic Floor Dysfunction

Woman in shock because her pelvic floor issues can be solved

Some of Most Embarrassing Pelvic Floor Problems (And How to Feel Confident Again)

(Let’s Stop Whispering)

This is not an exhaustive list and if you would like to discuss a particular concern, please book a quick chat with me!

But let’s start by getting these common ones out of the way.

If you’ve ever:

• crossed your legs before a sneeze

• planned routes around toilets

• avoided jumping, laughing or yoga

• worn “safe” underwear just in case

You’re not failing. You’re just adapting.

Pelvic floor dysfunction isn’t embarrassing because it’s rare, no, it’s embarrassing because no one talks about it properly.

So let’s.

1. Leaking (AKA “Why did that just happen?”)

Why it feels mortifying:
Because we’re told leaking = weak. And weakness = your fault.

What’s actually happening:
Most leaks aren’t about strength. They’re about pressure and pressure mismanagement. Holding your breath. Bracing your abs. Gripping “just in case.” Your pelvic floor is often overworking, not underperforming.

Make it less awkward today

• Stop “just in case” wees.

  Most of us who have experienced pelvic floor dysfunction, do this. But it is actually rewiring your brain bladder connection. We defo don’t want to just stop these and worry about what might happen, but we do want to gradually rewire our brains. So, pick some times when you can start to practice this. Like going shopping at Tescos or the like (they always have a toilet!) don’t do a just in case pee and then if you need one when you get there, go. Or taking the dog for a walk, go for a short walk and see how you feel or walk where you know there are public toilets.

• Exhale during effort.

  If we hold our breath we create an enormous amount of downwards pressure and this coupled with a tight or underactive pelvic floor can cause leaks. Next time you lift something try exhaling. On an exhale our pelvic floor and pelvic organs should be moving up automatically. Then if you are carrying something just breathe (once it’s lifted) because we build a resillient pelvic floor through load (which means carrying shopping and breathing or carrying a baby and breathing, is actually a good thing for your pelvic floor).

• Ditch constant clenching (your pelvic floor hates it)

• Often times when we are worried we clench. We clench our jaw, our hands, our toes and our ribs and this creates an enormous amount of tension in our pelvic floor. Think about it, your jaw is the start (or end) of a tube that ends up at your anus!!! If you clench your toes and hands or ribs they all create tension in your thoracic diaphragm (that’s a muscle that joins all the way around your ribs and separates your breath from your digestion. If your diaphragm is tight, your oesphogas goes through it and it can create too much tension there but it also automatically creates tension in your pelvic floor.

Try this
Sit. Feet down. Jaw soft. Drop your tongue down to help this.
Inhale into ribs.
Slow, fog-the-mirror exhale.
Repeat for 2 minutes.

Or do this and use box breathing - visualise. box in front of you. Inhale through your nose (or mouth if you struggle with this) for four and trace the top line of the box. Exhale through a relaxed jaw (think fogging a window in car or your glasses) and trace the side of the box. Inhale gently again for four and trace the bottom of the box and exhale relaxed no strain for four again up the last side. repeat 4-5 times.

No squeezing.

2. Vaginal Wind (Yes, we’re going there)

Why it’s cringe-inducing:
Because nobody warned you this was a thing. But it does happen to folk in yoga classes all the time (I remember it happening to me when I was in my 20’s)

What’s actually going on:
Air gets trapped when:

• posture collapses

• breath is held

• transitions are rushed

• the pelvic floor is gripping like it’s on duty 24/7

This isn’t “looseness.” **It’s much more about coordination.

Make it less dramatic

• Slow your transitions

• Exhale when standing up

• Soften before you move

• Check your posture, which means see if your ribs and pelvis are roughly aligned.

Try this
Lie down. Knees bent. Slowly roll your pelvis side to side. Let the breath move. No control. Just curiosity.

**A quick clarification (because this gets misunderstood): Queefing isn’t usually a sign of a “loose” pelvic floor. In most cases, air enters the vaginal canal because of pressure changes like breath-holding, bracing, rushed transitions, or a pelvic floor that’s gripping and slow to adapt. In some bodies, connective tissue changes or postpartum tissue softness can make air more likely to be retained once it’s entered, but that’s different from air getting in in the first place. This is why many women who queef actually have overactive or tense pelvic floors, and why improving breath, posture, timing and recoil often reduces the issue — even without doing a single Kegel.

3. That Heavy, Dragging Feeling

Why it freaks people out:
Because it comes with the thought: “What if something falls out?”

What’s actually happening:
Heaviness often reflects:

• fatigue

• stiff ribs or spine

• dehydrated fascia

• a nervous system stuck on high alert

Symptoms change because your system does.

Make it less scary

• Sit before you’re exhausted

• Stop checking constantly

• Support your breath before movement

• and to hydrate the fascia do keep moving - symptoms will increase if you stop.

Try this
Stand against a wall.
Soft knees.
Inhale wide into ribs.
Exhale and feel a gentle internal lift.

Gentle. Not forced. This is about building awareness not making things happen.

Or

Standing, gentle bend in your knees - visualise your coccyx as if it is a pencil or a lazar. Take that point and draw a figure 8 on the floor, your pelvis will move, go slow and do 5 one way ad then repeat the other way.

4. Wind, Bowels & Toilet Awkwardness

Why it’s deeply embarrassing:
Because we still pretend bowel stuff doesn’t exist. It is like a big taboo, but we all do it. some 1 a day, some 2-3, some every other day, some less often. You know your pattern and will know better than anyone else if that pattern is off. A lot of the time tis can be helped with diet and for more info on that (Anna can help here) She specialises in gut issues and i highly recommend her to clients going through gut and bowel issues.

What’s actually going on from a physical aspect:
Often linked to:

• jaw and throat tension

• holding patterns

• stress and urgency loops

If the jaw can’t release, the pelvic floor usually won’t either.

Make it less uncomfortable

• Never push when doing a number 2

• Use a footstool to elevate your knees so they are a little higher than your hips

• Longer exhales = easier release - make a moooo sounds and round your lips gently.

Try this
One hand on jaw. One on lower belly.
Slow inhale. Using your ribs.
Long sighing exhale.
Let the jaw slacken.

Take your time. Don’t rush it.

The pelvic floor listens.

5. Avoiding Movement Altogether

Why this hurts most:
Because you didn’t stop moving out of laziness. You stopped because movement had consequences.

That’s not fear. That’s been your body learning and adapting.

What actually helps:
We don’t need to force confidence. We need rebuild your trust in your body — slowly.

Try this
Before standing, and when standing, rock gently. Forward. Back. Side to side.
Really do Keep breathing. Relax your jaw.
Teach your nervous system that movement is safe again.

Confidence Comes From Understanding definitely Not Control

You don’t need:

• more squeezing

• more discipline

• more pushing through

You need:

• better pressure management

• softer coordination

• a nervous system that feels safe enough to let go

That’s how your confidence returns. Quietly. Steadily. From the inside out.

Ready to stop managing symptoms and start understanding your body?

I help women learn how to move, breathe and live without constantly bracing or worrying.

If this post felt like it was written for you, that’s not an accident.

→ Explore my beginner Hypopressives & release programme
→ Or book a Pelvic Floor MOT and get clear on what your body actually needs or join my new 12 week (6 session programme)

References & Further Reading

Bo, K. (2017). Pelvic floor muscle function and dysfunction. International Urogynecology Journal.

Hodges, P. W., & Gandevia, S. C. (2000). Activation of the human diaphragm during postural tasks. Journal of Physiology.

Dietz, H. P. (2008). Pelvic floor trauma following childbirth. Current Opinion in Obstetrics and Gynecology.

Van der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score. (Nervous system and holding patterns.)

Bordoni, B., et al. (2016). The diaphragm muscle: anatomy, physiology, and clinical relevance. Journal of Multidisciplinary Healthcare.