Leaking When You Laugh, Cough or Lift? Here’s What Your Breath and Load Management Must Know

Woman laughing - managing pressure - no pelvic floor dysfunction

Common… but Not Normal

You’re really not alone if you cross your legs before you sneeze or make excuses to avoid jumping on trampolines.
One in three women experience bladder leaks after childbirth and this increases to three in four after menopause, but common doesn’t mean normal.

We’ve been told for years that leaking is a sign of pelvic floor weakness. That we need to “squeeze more” or “do our Kegels.” But that advice often misses the real issue. Most leaks don’t happen because you’re weak… they happen because of pressure mismanagement.

When we hold our breath, brace our abs, or bear down during effort, the pressure inside the abdomen has to go somewhere, and that’s usually down. The pelvic floor, your bladder, and your confidence all take the hit.

This post will show you how changing the way you breathe, move, and lift can stop those “oops” moments, and help you rebuild trust in your body again.

Leaks Aren’t Always About Weakness

When the pelvic floor can’t match the pressure above it, leaks happen. That doesn’t automatically mean it’s “weak.”

For many women I work with, the pelvic floor is actually tight but tired, overactive, or out of sync. Add in stress, shallow breathing, or years of “holding your tummy in” and it’s really no surprise that the system loses its natural reflexes.

Think of your pelvic floor like a trampoline. When the springs are supple, it rebounds easily; when pulled too tight, it can’t absorb force. The same applies to your body, your pelvic floor needs movement and elasticity, not constant gripping.

So, instead of clenching harder, the first step is actually learning to truly let go and to teach the body safety and rhythm again.

Breath: The Missing Piece in Pelvic Floor Rehab

Every inhale you do creates intra-abdominal pressure; every exhale releases it. If you upper-chest breathe, belly breathe, brace your abs, or forget to exhale when lifting or coughing, that pressure builds downward.

Here’s what happens:

• The diaphragm and pelvic floor work as a team. When you breathe in, the diaphragm descends and the pelvic floor naturally yields. When you exhale, both lift together.

• Holding your breath (the Valsalva technique) traps pressure, pushing it into your bladder or pelvic floor.

• Sucking in your stomach restricts the diaphragm and breaks that natural piston movement.

  Try this now:

• Place both hands on your ribs holding them at the sides.

• Breathe in so your ribs widen sideways (ideally they widen like a circle but the easiest change to make right now is lateral movement, So we are not thrusting the ribs forward. You will feel your abdominal muscles move too, this is perfect.

• Then exhale through the mouth, letting your ribs gently draw in and your pelvic floor rise.

This is your basic 360° breath, the foundation of Hypopressives and The Abby Method. It teaches your core and pelvic floor to start to share pressure evenly without force or strain, just flow.

🏋️‍♀️ Load Management: How You Move Matters

Every lift, laugh, or cough creates load. Leaks happen when that load exceeds what your system can manage, not because your body isn’t capable of it, but because the forces aren’t being shared well just now.
Instead of avoiding movement (or crossing your legs every time you cough), you need to learn to organise pressure so it disperses through your whole body.

When you cough, your diaphragm contracts sharply downward, and your pelvic floor should rebound upward in response a bit like a trampoline catching and returning force. That reflexive rebound is exactly what we want to retrain.
But if you clench, cross your legs, or tuck your pelvis under to “protect” yourself, you interrupt that rebound. The pressure stays trapped in the centre, teaching your body to guard instead of move freely.

Here’s how to help the pelvic floor dissipate pressure instead:

1. Stay open through your ribs — try not to hunch or compress your chest.

2. Let your knees be soft, feet grounded and slightly apart, this can be the hardest thing, I found actually breathing helped!

3. Exhale as you cough — yes, actually blow the air out rather than brace.

4. Angle your pelvis slightly forward as you cough, you can do this in standing or sitting, this gentle lean helps the pressure move diagonally through the body rather than straight down, placing less direct pressure on the pelvic floor.

5. Allow the pelvic floor to lift and release naturally rather than gripping before the cough. Try not to grip it in expectation.

6. Keep ribs and pelvis stacked — literally on top of each other, not tucked.

Even everyday moments like picking up a laundry basket, reaching for a child or laughing with friends, can become pelvic floor retraining opportunities when you use breath, alignment, and subtle weight shifts to share load evenly.
Each of these actions sends a small, real-world challenge through your system these can be the perfect chances to practise coordination rather than contraction.
By allowing the diaphragm and pelvic floor to move together, keeping pressure flowing diagonally through the body (not straight down), and maintaining a sense of length and release rather than bracing, you start to re-educate your reflexes.
This is where the magic happens: the pelvic floor begins to respond automatically again actually lifting and releasing in rhythm with breath and movement which will remove your feeling of needing to consciously “squeeze” it.

The Gentle Reset That Stops Leaks

Forget squeezing harder. The real goal is proper coordination and teaching your body to respond reflexively again.

Start here:

1. 5-Minute Breath Reset — Lie down in a semi supine (knees bent, feet on the floor), and practise 360° rib expansion. You can totally do this standing or sitting in your car at traffic lights or standing in the queue at Tescos (insert your shopping centre here)

2. Ribcage Mobility — Wrap your hands around your ribs and breathe into your palms, side to side.

3. Hypopressives Practice — Three times a week, try gentle apnoea work (the “vacuum” breath) to train reflexive lift do come and learn this with me first so you get it right.

4. Gradual Load Building — Add walking, squats, or bridges with resistance bands as your body learns to manage pressure naturally.

As your nervous system learns safety again, the leaks fade. Posture improves. Confidence returns. Not because you became “stronger,” but because you learned how to move with your body not against it.

The Bottom Line

Leaking when you laugh, cough, or lift isn’t a sign of failure it’s really just excellent feedback.
Your body is asking for balance, not punishment.

By changing how you breathe and move, you transform pressure into power. You stop fearing the next sneeze and properly start trusting your body’s natural intelligence.

✨ If you’re ready to learn the breath and movement strategies that rebuild pelvic confidence from the inside out, try my £29.95 Hypopressives Mini-Course this is your safe starting point for lasting control without squeezing or straining.

Because once you understand pressure, you’ll never call leaking “normal” again.