How to Tell if Your Pelvic Floor Is Tight or Weak
Confused About Your Pelvic Floor? You’re Not Alone
If you’ve ever been told “just do your Kegels” and you’ve tried, but things still feel off (or worse), it’s because squeezing isn’t necessarily the thing that’s going to fix your pelvic floor. You’ve just not been told the full story.
Here’s the truth: a strong (I actually prefer to say “functional”) pelvic floor isn’t always a tight one. And a weak pelvic floor isn’t always loose. Sometimes the problem is that your muscles are gripping for dear life, so they can’t actually do their job. Or are not getting the right messages and so are essentially switched off.
Let’s break it down so you can finally understand what your body’s been trying to tell you.
Why “Just Do Your Kegels” Isn’t Always the Answer
Somewhere along the way, it has become ingrained in us that a healthy pelvic floor means squeezing. Every. Single. Day.
But here’s the thing: you can’t strengthen what’s already switched on all the time. A muscle that never fully releases can’t contract properly either. That means the same symptoms—leaking, heaviness, urgency—can show up in both tight and weak pelvic floors.
So if you’ve been squeezing for months and things haven’t improved, it’s time to stop clenching with no end in sight and start paying attention to what your body actually needs..
How This Small Group of Muscles Affects Your Whole Body
Your pelvic floor isn’t an island. It’s a team player: a hammock of muscles, fascia, and nerves that
supports your bladder, uterus, and bowel
controls when you pee, poo, and pass wind
stabilises your spine and pelvis
works with your diaphragm every time you breathe
And helps absorb the force of activities like jumping, running and laughing
When everything’s balanced, it moves like a trampoline, lifting, releasing, and responding with each breath. It moves through activation and release as you inhale and exhale, remembering how to function as part of your whole body.
When that balance is lost, the whole system feels off: your posture, your breath, your core, even your mood.
Signs of a Tight Pelvic Floor
When Holding On Causes More Harm Than Help
If you constantly feel like you’re on guard, physically or emotionally, there’s a good chance your pelvic floor is too. These are the common red flags:
leaking when you cough, sneeze, or laugh
pain during sex or internal exams
constipation or feeling blocked
difficulty starting or stopping urine
lower-back, hip, or tailbone tension
a constant sense of clenching in your pelvis or glutes
That’s not weakness. It’s overactivity. Often linked to stress, trauma, or posture habits, your body’s stuck in protection mode. It’s literally holding on to support you.
If you start working with your breath, not against it, your pelvic floor begins to remember how to respond and release. That’s when the true function starts to return.
Signs of a Weak Pelvic Floor
When Support Is Missing
Now let’s talk about true under-activity. If you’ve had a baby, surgery, or long periods of inactivity, your muscles might have lost tone, been damaged or just lost the connection to the rest of your body.
Look out for:
a heaviness or dragging feeling
leaking when running, jumping, or lifting
trouble holding in wee or gas
a visible bulge or prolapse
less sensation or awareness down below
Pain
A need to press on your perineum to support it
Many women have both tightness and weakness in different areas. You might have one muscle gripping while another has given up, which is why just squeezing often doesn’t work .
(If you’re local, explore pelvic floor physiotherapy in Edinburgh for assessment and holistic rehab options.)
Why Stress, Breath, and Posture All Matter
The Nervous System Connection
Your pelvic floor doesn’t just respond to movement. It responds to your emotions.
When your nervous system is stuck in “fight or flight,” your muscles tighten to protect you. When you finally feel safe, they can release and rebuild strength and function again.
That’s why I don’t separate the physical from the emotional in my work. We use breath, posture, and nervous-system regulation to bring the body back into balance.
You can’t rebuild from tension. You rebuild from trust.
Simple Awareness Exercises to Understand Your Body
Test, Don’t Guess
Before you rush to strengthen or stretch, get curious. Try these gentle awareness cues (they’re not diagnostics, just invitations to notice):
During an exhale, can you sense the release in your pelvic floor, or does it stay tense? If you can’t, try sitting on a cushion or fit ball and see if that helps you tune in.
Scan your body. Are your jaw, shoulders, or glutes constantly clenched? (They’re all linked.)
Notice your breath. Is it shallow in your chest, or do your ribs and sides of your body expand? That’s the difference between full-body breath and belly breathing.
Full-body, or 360° breathing, allows movement through your ribcage, sides, and back so your diaphragm and pelvic floor can move as a team. Belly breathing focuses movement only forward, which can increase downward pressure and make pelvic symptoms worse.
Try This: 360° Breathing Practice
Sit with a neutral spine (rib cage over your pelvis like two bowls of water balanced) with your feet on the floor and hands around your lower ribs.
Inhale gently through your nose and feel your ribcage widening sideways, like an umbrella opening. Feel the breath expand into your back and sides of your ribs at the same time.
Exhale slowly through your mouth and feel your ribs glide back in, your body settling and lengthening.
Repeat for 6 to 8 breaths, noticing your shoulders and jaw, if you clench or lift invite them to soften.
You can try this lying down, sitting, or standing. It’s not about forcing a deep breath—it’s about finding space again.
Gentle Movement Awareness
If you’re feeling brave, add a little movement:
Rocking Breath: Sit on a fit ball or just a chair. As you breathe in, rock slightly forward. As you breathe out, rock back (don’t tuck your bum under too much). Feel how your breath naturally shifts pressure through your pelvis.
Rib Wrap Stretch: Place your hands around your lower ribs, elbows out. Take a breath in and imagine the space between your thumbs and fingers expanding evenly. Breathe out and feel them return together, like a gentle accordion.
These simple explorations help your body remember how to coordinate breath, posture, and pelvic floor without strain or “doing more.”
“Tightness isn’t strength. It’s your body trying to support you.”
From Release to Strength - What Your Body Really Needs
The Path Back to Balance
Here’s where most programmes go wrong: they start with strengthening. But if your base layer is tight and tense, you’re just building on a locked system.
Start here instead.
If you’re tight
Focus on breathwork, Hypopressives, and release work. These help your diaphragm and pelvic floor move together again, easing pressure and restoring reflexes.
If you’re weak
Once things feel more responsive through awareness, add gentle functional strength such as walking, resistance bands, or core-flow work. Make sure you’re managing your breath and posture first. That foundation matters more than the number of reps. The goal is stability through movement, not stillness.
If you’re both
Welcome to the club—most of us are. Start with awareness and release, then rebuild strength in layers.
(You can explore specific methods here: Hypopressives, TRE & Somatic Release, Postnatal Pelvic Recovery.)
Working With a Pelvic Floor Specialist
You Don’t Have to Figure This Out Alone
If you’ve been guessing what’s going on down there for months (or years), please know you don’t have to DIY this. A trained pelvic floor specialist can help you understand your unique pattern and build a recovery plan that works with your body, not against it.
In my own work, I combine breath-led movement, Hypopressives, and nervous-system regulation to help women reconnect, release, and rebuild. Whether you’re in Scotland or online, we can explore your next step together.
Strength Isn’t the Goal—Connection Is
Here’s the part nobody tells you.
Healing your pelvic floor isn’t about doing more reps or clenching harder. It’s about reconnection and movement.
When you start breathing with your body instead of fighting it, and let movement return to your system, your strength comes back naturally—from the inside out.
“When you learn to listen to your body, and build awareness, function follows naturally.”
Quick Recap
Tight pelvic floor = body holding on Weak pelvic floor = body switched off Most women = a mix of both
Your job? Create safety, space, and awareness first. The rest—the strength, the confidence, the freedom—will follow.
